Photo Credit: Robert Vitulano
Breakups can be an ugly affair. They are never taken well because they mark the end of a beautiful beginning. Until and unless the other person tortured you for you to wish for things to end,you always find ways to stick together.
It seems like the end of the world when the person, who was once your priority, doesn’t even give a second thought to being with you, let alone giving you the same importance as you gave them.
But if so, then do yourself a favor,DO NOT forget the love and respect you hold for yourself or rather what you should hold for yourself and mar them by doing any or all of the things stated below :
1) MAKE DRUNK CALLS!
Okay now,THIS puts you in the worst situation possible. Friends take you out to drink and have fun, to get your mind off and give it some rest from being depressed and you ,easily, loose hold of your emotions.
Venting out your anger at your current situation or letting your tears betray you, among peers, is okay because a few hugs, pep talks and attention is what you require but letting your emotions cloud your judgement and trying to return to your past by giving him/her a call is equivalent to kissing goodbye to your self-respect.
An attempt made in your weak moment to get them back is only going to worsen the situations for you.Always remember, there is a reason why they are not there beside you, anymore.
“Do you add milk to your coffee?”….”He used to add milk to his coffee….” So? Several people do that! STOP being relative! Stop relating every love song(especially Broken by Seether) to your relationship and then tearing up on how it went downhill.
People generally advice you to avoid watching romantic movies because you are in such a vulnerable state that even if you try, you just can’t hold it in and you don’t have to but sometimes relating your situation to a song or a movie or other happy couples not only causes nuisance for all but also makes the problem appear bigger than it is and uncontrollable. Come on sweetie, YOU CAN HANDLE THIS!
Relationship is a personal affair between two people and it should remain that way even when it’s over. Stop telling people the countless times he didn’t do what he should have or she couldn’t understand you.
People don’t usually care and if they do, they start holding views and judging your partner(ex) without even meeting them in person. You won’t be the bigger man/woman by putting the other down. If people ask you the reason for your breakup, “It just didn’t work” is a sufficient enough answer.
People get into a relationship out of love. You just cannot force it onto someone! If it’s one of you who wishes for separation, you can reason them out but that’s all that you can do.
DO NOT beg them to take you back! You are a well respected individual with your own standing in the society, value that. Even if they take you back,do not expect things to go back as they were because the damage is already done and the spark, long gone.
And, if they come back apologizing for what they did and you feel that the reason isn’t justified enough for their actions, then its okay to say ‘NO’ no matter what your history had been, because sometimes, its the perfect way of loving and respecting yourself.
5)RAPIDLY GETTING HOOKED UP
People say that breakup blues can be removed by getting into another relationship. CRAP. Rather, take some time off for yourself, analyse where you stand,how can you improve,how can you achieve emotional stability BUT be open to all kinds of opportunities.
Often friends get you to meet new people with the intention that you will stop being depressing and end up dating this new guy/girl, which is totally a possibility but always remember : Don’t rush yourself into a relationship, take your time and trust me, if this new guy/girl really values you and wants you to be a part of their life, they’d wait.